Day 3: Hallucinations and Nonsense

Has your heart ever been broken by the one you love leaving you? It has happened to the Suburban Farmer many times. Dear Reader, think back to the very first time it happened to you. What was it? High School? College? There was this one point that I'm sure you remember: you can see her right in front of you but you'll never be together again. And remember that night, lying in bed alone, when you know that just yesterday she was lying there with you? In your relative infancy, you start to think of time as a road where, if you just turn around, you can walk back to that same spot again and maybe do better next time. Somewhere out there in the world that night, she still existed, but you could not have her. Know that feeling?

That is how I feel about pizza right now. Last Sunday, I could have gone out to the store and picked up my favorite guilty pleasure: a Tombstone Supreme Pizza (I'd pick the olives off). There are still pizzas out there to be had. But I cannot have one…

Good thing that I've hardened myself against heartbreak or else I'd be wandering the grocery store right now… the creepy ex-boyfriend of the pizza in the freezer case. Anyway, what does this tell me? Those recent clichés about Love and Food (look at any recipe book shelf in the local bookseller and you'll know what I mean) are, like all clichés, based on something. In this case, like in many cases, we've kinda forgotten what they're based on. We are food. I think we are all in love with food, but are taking that fair beauty for granted.
Come to think of it, old clichés are losing their luster as well. "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach" doesn't mean a hell of a lot with a McDonald's in every town. And as food chains have gone more high class, there is truly good food close to everyone these days. Except for Wyoming, anyway.

I'm digressing from the meaning of this little story and will get myself back on track. I slept well and got up, again, very hungry. I had half of yesterday's batch of thin pancakes left over and that was my most delicious breakfast. Come 10:15 a.m., I was again very hungry. I moved into the "grazing" method of eating very smoothly. I had a portion of my lunch (the eggplant with some tomato sauce) then and once 1:00 hit, I had the rest (a mixture of collards, rainbow chard, jalapeño, and shallot boiled together) and a hard boiled egg.

That was the first time I had one of the green eggs hard boiled. It peeled really easily. I was surprised. Generally, I hate hard boiled eggs for the sole reason that they make me feel like an ape trying to knit a blanket.

The softball game I was to play in was postponed again due to rain, so I came right home at 5:30 and got into another half batch of thin pancakes (this Daisy flour is absolutely delicious). I've felt awake and alert all day and this grazing has helped a lot… along with getting the calories up to an adult level.

But as I sit here – satisfied – I realize that I could not have a bigger challenge than tomorrow. I will not be at my normal place of work, but working from a contractor's office 25 miles from my Suburban Farm. Normally in these situations, it's a cheesesteak with pepperoni lunch. Thinking about that now, I am enticed, and again thinking about pizza.

No. I shall juice the quarts of grape tomatoes I have in preparation for late year canning, read another few essays out of Wampeters, Foma & Granfaloons, and sleep until the next morning, dreaming the whole time, I'm sure, of my lost love.

Breakfast: ½ cup flour, half an egg, ½ cup milk, a tablespoon of blueberry butter
First Lunch: A slice of bread (as crumbs), half an eggplant, two tablespoons of sauce
Second Lunch: ½ cup of collards, same of chard, half a jalapeño, a small slice of shallot, and an egg
Dinner: ½ cup flour, half an egg, ½ cup milk, a tablespoon of blueberry butter
All day: a ton of water